Spiritual bullying…yes, you read the title right. That is exactly what it says.
What does it mean, though?
Let’s take a brief look and try to understand it better and resolve to help ourselves not become spiritual bullies!
Spiritual Bullies are everywhere!
We attend worship services with them, we engage in social media with them, we see them in stores and public activities, and we may even be married to one!
So, just who is a spiritual bully? Well, there are probably many ways to look at this question, but a few that come to mind are: those educated in scripture that never want to be wrong, those ignorant in scripture that never think they are wrong, those not humble enough to study scriptures and have a change of mind and heart when they are wrong, those who force their traditional beliefs or customs on others, and those who are just plain mean and unkind in their approach to most anything.Spiritual Bullies were in the early church!
A few passages come to mind when I think of spiritual bullies.
1 Timothy 1:20 records Paul’s calling out of Hymaneus and Alexander because they have made shipwreck of their faith. Now, don’t misunderstand, there is no mention that they were bullying anyone, but it seems to me that they had this type of an attitude considering that our brother Paul was also the same person who wrote Ephesians 4:15 and other passages in which we find that he would approach kindness in restoration. Were they being bullies? Evidence is not clear, but their attitude toward their own faith may be certainly evident of that.
3 John 9-10 names another spiritual bully. A man by the name of Diotrophes is recorded here by John. The bullying that we see from Diotrophes is one that may be all too contagious in our society today. Narcissism might be the easiest and best description. Diotrophes had an attitude that he was the greatest and that others needed to agree on all things or they themselves were wrong.
There are many other passages and individuals (or groups) that we can list and think about. We can even remember when Paul himself prior to his own conversion was a spiritual bully for the wrong things! Jesus said that the Scribes and Pharisees wanted the center of attention in Matthew 23:1-7, and of course in Matt 7, Jesus spends a lot of time addressing false prophets/teachers that also bully their way spiritually into sound congregations and taint pure-hearted Christians.Spiritual Bullies may be closer than we think!
As we looked at Diotrophes, I had to take a break for a few minutes as I reflected on my own spiritual behavior and conversations with others. There are probably times in which all of us may find ourselves with too much pride or arrogance to carry on a fruitful conversation, teach an edifying lesson, or evangelize the lost in denominations or the world. I can think of past times in which I had studied with someone and they never obeyed the gospel. As I reflect on these conversations, I am reminded of some statements that I may have made, an opinion that I may have forced, or even an attitude of Diotrophes in wanting to always be right and the greatest.
Spiritual bullying is sometimes hard to spot when we look in the mirror. The reflection sometimes in a mirror may not reveal the closest of things in our imperfections on the outward body, but they never ever reflect all of our imperfections of the heart! That takes a deeper looking into your and my own lives in order to find that attitude, identify how to overcome it, repent, and transform those spiritual bullying concepts into spiritually edifying ones that lead to growth and not disembodiment.
Have you been a spiritual bully? I know I have. If any of us has, we need to be humble enough to admit our wrongs and repent. Pride is a sin that is listed multiple times, and pride is a symptom of spiritual bullying as much as anything else. Turn off the prideful look and look into your own heart today and see if there is a bully lurking around that could change to glorify God better, ease your own burdens, and encourage others.
One last scripture on this thought comes from the wise writer of Proverbs -"Pride goeth before destruction and an haughty spirit before a fall" (Prov. 16:18)