"Fornication - The Subject No One Likes to Discuss" - Amy Lawrence

Let’s be serious here. An honest Christian is not comfortable talking about sex. Embarrassment is the common reaction to even the mention of the word. There are, of course, plenty of subjects that are uncomfortable subjects, but this one is a doozy. This thing that permeates our society so deeply is understandably the number-one taboo of topics when it comes to conversation. Most wouldn’t see the Bible as a book filled with mention of the physical joining of man and woman, but it has a great deal to say about it. And no wonder! The Almighty God, creator of all that is, designed the avenue of reproduction for all living things. Humans, however, are the only creatures given rules about how to use our specific reproductive method. Why? Because humans are the only creatures created in the likeness of God. In this article, we will study from scripture the right and the wrong of sexual interaction between man and woman. 

Fornication is such a rarely discussed yet commonly understood subject of society. It’s in our music, books, movies, television shows, even video games contain the sexual interaction God intended only for a husband and wife. The Greek word πορνεία (porneia) is translated “fornication” in the KJV and “sexual immorality” in the NKJV. It is defined as any sexual act outside of legal marriage of man and woman. I will ask again: why? When hormones are raging and our desires nearly impossible to deny, why does God set rules for us that no other creature must follow? Because we have something no other creature has. There is a part of every human that is spiritual as God is spiritual, Gen. 1:26, Jn. 4:24. We have a soul. We are also the only creatures that will be judged for the choices we make, 2 Cor. 5:10-11. If Heaven is our desired destination, then that soul must be pure in order to inhabit that Heavenly place, Rev. 21:27. All souls will return to God, Ecc. 12:7, be judged, Heb. 9:27, and sorted, Mt. 25:31-46. And so, the first thing we must study is purity. 

If I were to set two obviously clean, empty glasses in front of you, pour clear, filtered water into both, and then dump a handful of dust from the surface of my entertainment center into one of the glasses, which would you choose to drink when asked? I should hope you wouldn’t answer by drinking the dusty one. No sane person would drink the dusty one. We all know why - because it is impure. Mentally stable people choose the clean glass of water. God wants purity as well. God uses purity to describe marriage, Heb. 13:4. The union of marriage through the laws of God Almighty are laid out in the very first marriage found in scripture, Gen. 2:21-25. The very first marriage is the blueprint for all marriages! (Mt. 19:3-6) Purity is a big deal to God, in everything that is attached to His name - not just marriage. Purification in the Old Testament was a practice required for the people of God, Num. 19:20, for any item that came into the camp of the Israelites, Num. 31:20-24, and any item that was used to worship God, 1 Chr. 23:28. Under the New Testament law, God requires a pure heart, James 4:8, and a pure soul, 1 Pet. 1:22, in His children. Sin is the agent of impurity. God explained to Joshua what would happen when the impurity of sin was found within the camp of the Israelites in Joshua 7:10-15.  Today, sin found on our hearts and souls makes us impure. By washing away that sin, Acts 22:16, with the only thing that can wash sin away completely, Heb. 9:11-14, we make a choice to live a certain kind of life and must continue in this life to be clean, 1 Jn. 1:7.

Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians dealt with a lot of sexual sins being committed by those within the church. In the first-century city of Corinth stood the temple of the pagan goddess Aphrodite. The Greeks believed Aphrodite to be the patron goddess of love and fertility. One of the practices of the “priestesses” of this temple was prostitution. It was considered “sacred” by pagans to commit sexual immorality with these women. This stigma was a part of the city’s identity, a temptation that was made incredibly difficult to avoid by those that were coming away from paganism and into the church. Knowing this detail makes it easier to understand a lot of the first letter to the Corinthians, especially chapters 6-7. Paul referenced all the sexual sins the Christians at Corinth formerly suffered; fornication, adultery, homosexuality, and sodomy, 1 Cor. 6:9. In chapter 5, a Christian had returned to the temptation he had escaped. A male Christian was having sexual relations with his stepmother, and Paul was addressing this man’s sin and the Corinthians’ apathy toward the sin, 1 Cor. 5:1-2. (Long story short - the man confessed and repented, abandoned his sinful ways, and returned to the church, 2 Cor. 2:6-7.) We, in our society today, share a similar problem with the Corinthians. Sexual immorality is so prominent in our culture, we’ve become immune to being as disgusted with it as God is. (That’s the definition of ‘abomination’ - a thing that disgusts God.) It is important to know the rules God has laid out for sexual relations so that we: 1.) do not become immune, 2.) do not become ensnared by the sin, and 3.) are able to teach others.

The rules are fairly basic: 

1.)Marriage is one man+one woman, for life, Gen. 2:21-24, not man+man or woman+woman, Rom. 1:24-27, not one man+multiple women or one woman+multiple men, Mt. 19:4-5. 

2.)Marriage comes before sex, 1 Cor. 7:9. If you’re not married, don’t have sex, 1 Cor. 6:18-20. 

3.)If married and had sex with someone other than the spouse, the mistake has either procured a lifetime of unmarried celibacy, Mt. 5:32, or it has created a difficult and trying journey toward regaining trust with an incredibly faithful and forgiving spouse. 

4.)If you’ve found someone that you love, want to spend the rest of your life with, and want to have sex with, you’d better first make sure of their marital status; single, married, or divorced? If you’re both single, see #2. If married, see #3. If divorced, you would do well to determine the cause of their divorce. If it was adultery on their part, see #3. If it was adultery on their spouse’s part, see #2. If you’re a man loving a man, see #1-2. If you’re a woman loving a woman, see #1-2.

Paul made a recommendation to the Corinthians during the “present distress” (1 Cor. 7:26) of prominent fornication in the city. He recommended that anyone currently unmarried remain so, 1 Cor. 7:8. It was not a command, vs. 28. It was advice. Paul was trying to spare them the possible pain of being left or cheated by a spouse that was pagan because they didn’t hold to the rules of Christianity. Paul even made it clear that if they left, the Christian was to let them go because they had no right to force them to stay, 1 Cor. 7:15. The hard part about this? If left by a spouse and no fornication was committed, one must remain unmarried, 1 Cor. 7:10-11. It’s a hard life. We were warned that it would be, 1 Pet. 2:21. Too many Christians have bought into the “do what makes you happy” mantra. Most things people see as “happiness” are the things that, in the long run, make them the most unhappy people. Sex is one of the stronger temptations and has one of the most difficult consequences. It is the only sin one commits against his own flesh, 1 Cor. 6:18. God is the Creator. If anyone knows what true happiness is and how to get it, it is He…but one must follow His instructions. 

I hope this study was helpful to you. No relationship will ever match the one we have with God, and anyone that asks you to sacrifice God for them is leading you down a path that will end only in unhappiness. Be careful whom you choose and why you are choosing them. Happiness can only be found in God.

~Amy Lawrence