HOM-1 - Introduction (Godly Homes)
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GODLY HOMES IN AN UNGODLY WORLD
"Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it;" Psalm
Welcome to our study of 'The Home'. God is the designer the
architect and the founder of the home and, as Psalm 127 one suggests, He
must be at the center of it for the home to really be what God wants it to be.
In fact, the home takes us all the way back to the early days of
creation when, in Genesis 2:24 God said, “For this reason a man shall
leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall
become one flesh.” The uniting of husband and wife creates that home unit.
It is designed by God and intended to be the foundation of man and
We begin by asking: Why do we need a study of the home?
Well, if one looks around just a little bit, he can tell that there is a dire
need for this study. For example: too many times the concept and ideas
that are the foundation of the home, instead of being founded upon the
Bible, are being framed by society and the media. Too many times society
tells us what a home is and what makes a good home and what their idea
of a home ought to be. Then of course the media has their part in it, where
there's homes now have two men and two women instead of man a
woman, where there are homes where the children really aren't what they
ought to be and guidelines aren't what God tells us they should be.
We need this study because children, young people, need to hear
what a godly home really ought to be. Homes are so different than they
used to be 10- 50 years ago. Young people are missing out on what God
expects from them and their parents in the home. Then of course, father
and mother, children, grandparents, parents, all need to be reminded of
what their role in the home ought to be.
We need this study because the biblical concept of the home is
definitely being undermined and attacked. Friend, we're living in a day and
age where the home no longer contains father and mother and children. It
may be two men in today's society it may be two women adopting children.
It may be a home where the children are running the household. That's not
what God planned and it's definitely being undermined and attacked by
society. Here's why it's so important in our study of the home: let's realize
souls are also at stake. The home, raised in a godly way and brought up by
God's standards, is the perfect environment to rear and shape souls for
eternity but today's homes many times are doing just the exact opposite of
If our society - listen carefully - if our society and if our nation is going
to be that godly nation. The fundamental foundation of any society and
nation is the home - a home where people love God, where people look out
for others interest, where people are actually concerned about their
neighbors and their friends and their family. That's the kind of home where
our nation and society can truly flourish and so in this series of lessons will
be talking about why there's such a need for godly homes today.
We'll talk about what God says concerning marriage and how
important that is to the foundation of every home. We'll look at the
devastating effect that divorce and remarriage is having on the home and
hopefully give some things that will help with that problem. We'll talk about
for young people especially dating, choosing a mate, how to behave
oneself in a godly manner, and then of course we'll talk about the roles in
the home - husband, wife, father, mother, parents, children. We hope to
address all of those things and see what God has to say on this very
We want to turn our attention as well to building a really strong
marriage and how in that marriage, there are at times problems we have to
deal with in the home. There's adversity and how does God expect us to
really build a godly home. Then we want to look at some lessons God also
has to say about those who may not have a mate, those who may have lost
their mate or what does God say about single people in it and how can they
glorify God in this day and age as well.
Let's begin by talking about one of the fundamental problems and
aspects of the home and that is the home and society. When we talk about
society, we're talking about a collection of families and homes may be living
in a geographical community area who strive to work together to build up
their own homes, their own families, and their community.
Let's realize this first: it's God who created marriage and naturally
created the home. “For this reason God said a man shall leave his father
and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh.
God made man a helper comparable to him,” Genesis 2:18. God, not
society, created the home and the family and thus if marriage and the
home is going be what God wants it to be and if it's going to have its
natural effect in society. Let's recognize God is the author of every home,
every family, and every marriage and they must give Him the credit.
In Matthew 19:3-6, Jesus would discuss the subject of divorce and
marriage but one of the key things He said about marriage and especially
their discussion of divorce was, "From the beginning it was not so."
Marriage, the family, its home, has its roots in the beginning of time, in
God's creation and thus marriage is the beginning of the home and the
family unit. For the family to be what God wants it to be, marriages must be
what God wants them to be. Did you know that marriage is one of the first
of three institutions that were created by God? We know that in Genesis 2,
God created marriage. He created man and woman. He put them together.
He formed the family unit. He told them to be fruitful and multiply and fill the
earth and from that, Adam and Eve had children and their children had
children. The family unit was begun by Almighty God. The other two
organizations are government.
Did you know that God created the government and is in control of it?
In Daniel 4, kings, princes rule by the control and power of God. God puts
them in charge, Romans 13:1-2. They're seen simply as God's ministers or
servants. Do I always understand why they are put in place, the people that
are put in place? No, but I know God has a purpose and a plan in mind.
Then of course, that third and highly important unit organization, living
organism, is the Lord's church. Jesus built it Matthew 16:18. He is the head
of it, Ephesians 1:22-23 and it is the divine purpose of God. And so, of
these three organizations of which all have an effect on the society and the
home, marriage, is indeed of supreme importance.
When we think about marriage and the first of these institutions that
God created, they all relate to each other in a very unique way. The
government is designed by God to enforce His will, to put in place as often
we think of, in our own country today. We're a country and nation where it
really ought to be one nation under God; where the government is
designed to influence and supplement and help the home. When the
government plays its role to supplement, to help the home, it plays the role
God wants it to. But too many times the government interferes in matters
where God has not designed them to.
God laid the foundation of the home. We don't now need the
government to redesign that the church. The church is not designed to
raise our children. The church is not designed to take the place of the
home. Rather homes and families, that are honoring God, ought to be a
part of the Lord's church and work together for His greatest cause. It's been
said this, "as goes the home so goes the nation." Friend, how true that is.
If we want to be a godly nation, we need to have godly homes that
will honor and really give glory to Him. Let me give an example of how the
home and whether it stays in keeping with God's laws or not has an effect
on society. For example: Gibbons, in his writings on the rise and fall of the
Roman Empire, noted one especially important reason that Rome fell. He
said one reason for the fall of Rome was this: the rapid increase in divorce
and the undermining of the dignity and sanctity of the home.
How could Rome, one of the greatest power houses governmentally
speaking in the world, fall so rapidly and so swiftly? The home, marriages,
began to be undermined. They began to look more to the government.
Homosexuality began to have a rapid increase in society. Families stopped
having that closeness. Children no longer respected father and mother. As
those things happened, the breakdown in the home led to the breakdown in
Friend, we really we live in a world - let's not fool ourselves - we live
in a society and a world where God's word is not reverenced as it used to
be. When people spoke of the Bible in generations before us, there was a
great sense of awe and reverence and respect. Today, many times God's
word is mocked and laughed at and looked on upon as an outdated book
that no longer speaks to society and its needs. Many attributes have
contributed to the breakdown in the home but indeed one of those is
disrespect for God and His word.
Did you know that statistics today are now showing that marriages
are just not as happy as they used to be? Marriage is not held in as high
esteem as it was in times past. Divorce is commonplace. Not so much in
years before, divorce was looked down upon as disgraceful, distasteful,
and something that people ought to be embarrassed about. Today, it's just
a problem you can solve with a little bit of cash and move on with your life
as though just a little bump in the road. The marriage indeed is breaking
down and part of that goes to our view of how we look at God and religion.
For example, a recent study showed that people who are more
involved in worship and God and church do indeed have better homes. For
example, in the 1972 to 1978 time period, among those who attended
church read regularly. Of the least educated in our country at that time,
about 32% of the least educated attended church. Those who had a
moderate education were about 40%, higher education about 38%
attended church. In all areas across the board education wise in the United
States in a 1972 to 1978 period, more people were attending church. From
2000 to the present, less people in every group are attending worship
regularly. For example, the least educated in our society today, only about
23% in that class actually attend church regularly. Of those who have a
moderate education, maybe high school, maybe a little more, about 30%
attend church regularly and of those in a higher education platform, only
about 34% are attending church regularly. You may be thinking: what does
that have to do with anything?
Friend, the more families are in tune with God's will and make
themselves availed of opportunities to worship God and study and the more
they come together as a family to put God first, the more those families
stick closer to God and His teaching.
You know, when we think about the home and society and its effects,
one of the problems that is occurring so much today is, instead of family
units, you've now just got a host of people who are living together.
Cohabitation, or living together, has become another way of making a
family unit. Today, instead of getting married, there's another alternative -
just live together and try it out. This wasn't always the case. In fact from
1970, we see that statistics show there were only 523,000 couples who are
actually living together. But watch the increase: 1990 we've now got 2.8
million couples living together, in the year 2009 that figure jumped to 6.6
million couples living together. 60% of marriages now proceed by people
Friend is that really what God designed? Did God design for people
just a shack up and live together and try it out? One would say that,
because of that, people now have the chance to see if they really want to
be happy in marriage and it ought to give a great benefit. Did you know
people are less happy? There are more divorces and homes are struggling
more than ever. Living together is indeed not God's way of dealing with the
Let me give you some more statistics of marriages and divorces per
1000 women ages 15 and older. I want to think about some things that
occurred and how and show how there is been a there has been a
progression in our society. For example, in 1970 of 1000 women who were
either married or divorced in 1970, 76.5 of those 1000 women were married
with only 14% of divorces occurred. Bring that up to 1985: of 1000 women
being put in a study, 56% now are only being married and 21% divorces.
Up to today 2009 to the present, you've now got of 1000 women, 36% of
those women being married and 16.4% divorce. Of 36% marriages, you've
now got 15% divorce. No doubt cohabitation has led to the decrease in
marriages but per capita 36% being married and 16% getting a divorce,
that's a statistical analysis of showing that 50%, nearly a staggering 50% of
marriages are ending in divorce. What a horrible statistic that is!
Well, let's think about this then: What then are some factors for the
home that will lead to a decrease in the likelihood of divorce or what things
can help a home stay together? Well, according to a study done, economic
stability was right at the top of that list. 30% of homes, the biggest
economic stability have a better shot of putting God first. You know my
friends, God hates teaches us how to have economic stability, to use our
money wisely, to give, to help, to do good, to do not be so materialistic. You
know, when we think about the family after marriage, if the people marry
who are over 25, there's a 24% chance better chance those people going
to stay together. In fact, if those people had an intact family history, that is
that if mother and father love each other and stay together, there's going to
be more of a chance of them staying together. Those who have a stable
religious affiliation, they have a 14% better chance of staying together.
What does all this say God and His principles about the family, about
marriage, about homes staying together, about putting Him first? All of that
will greatly help God and His people; will greatly help His people to trust
Him and to stay true to what He teaches and what we know can help the
Well, we ask the question then: What does all this matter? Here's
what matters: as Christians, we've got to take steps to ensure that we're
pleasing God with our families. Furthermore, we need to strive to be the
example that we can be in this world. What can the Christian family do?
You can be a godly example of what a real home ought to be like. Matthew
5:16 Jesus said, "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see
your good works and glorify your father who is in heaven." We want people
to see God in our homes; for our homes to be the example of what they
really ought to be. And truly that example can have an impact on the world.
We want to be a home, a godly home is a home where God's pattern
is realized and followed. "Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in
vain who build it." A godly home puts God's pattern above all else. We're
not concerned with just what's popular. We're not concerned with what
society may or may not do. We're concerned with what does God's pattern
say. How does God really want us to live? I'm reminded of that great
statement by the godly man Joshua. Joshua 24:15, Joshua said, "Choose
for yourselves this day whom you will serve" but then he said this, in spite
of what others may have been doing, what was popular, the pressure they
were receiving, Joshua said, "As for me and my house, we'll serve the
What's a godly home? A home that puts God's pattern, that puts God
before all else in matters of right and wrong. What's a godly home today?
It's a home where the Bible is studied and where prayer is offered and
where the church of the Lord Jesus Christ is of supreme importance.
Where is Bible study at in our homes today? Do you remember 2
Timothy 2:15, "Study to show yourself approved unto God." 2 Timothy
3:14-15, as a young person, Timothy was taught by his mother and his
grandmother from childhood the teachings of God. There's a godly
example: from very young age, Timothy had a mother and a grandmother
who were teaching him God's truth. Deuteronomy 6:6-9 in the Old
Testament, God said we're to put His law and His teaching in the home, on
the doorposts, as frontlets between our eyes, and every place, so people
can see God. What will help our homes today?
Friend, we need homes that really believe this book is from God and
are studying it and living it in their lives. Prayer needs to be an integral part
of the home. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 says we're to ‘pray without ceasing.’
We're to come boldly to the throne of grace that we might find mercy and
grace to help in time of need. Friend, listen real carefully, there are so
many distractions in the home today: Recreation, school, ball, and social
clubs, and all the attractions of the world. And in some of those things in
and of themselves may not be bad but the thing that still needs to be first is
the Lord's church.
Do you remember Matthew 6:33? Jesus said, "Seek first the
kingdom of God and His righteousness, all these things will be added unto
you." Let's get back to putting priorities where they need to be. The church,
the Bible, prayer, putting first the kingdom of God, that's what makes a
What else makes a godly home? Friend, a godly home is homes
where each person recognizes their role and responsibility and each
person does his heart his part to support the home. For example: husbands
are to be the head of the home Ephesians 5:22-29. Wives are to be the
Queen of the home, we might say, and be in submission to their husbands
again Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3. Children are to obey their parents in
the Lord Ephesians 6:1-4. The home is a place where each strives to do
We need men in the home who will stand up and be real leaders. I
too many times, parents, in society and media and sitcoms today, are
viewed as incompetent and mocked and laughed at. We need parents,
fathers who will be real spiritual leaders, mothers who show respect for the
home and its role and who put the home first, and children who realize that
mother and dad are in authority, that our responsibility is to obey them and
in so doing we respect God and His teaching.
Another aspect of a godly home is it's a home where God is
reverenced and purity is maintained in our conduct. What do we need in
the home today? We need to put God back on the pedestal where He
ought to be. God deserves to be honored, to be held up and to be
reverenced in the home. He's worthy of honor and praise. You open to
Revelation chapters 4 and 5 and in those context that the cry will go out
from heaven that the Lamb that God, who's on the throne is worthy of
honor and respect and glory. In the home, we need purity to be maintained
Friend, we ask you to think about your own home, to think about the
importance that the home plays in society. Are you really happy with where
the United States of America direction it's going today? Are you happy with
where our morals and our guidelines are? How is your home today? Is God
really the focus of your home? Friend, the best thing that each of us can
do, to help the shape of our nation and no doubt our home, is to put God
back in the center of every home.
Let's realize God founded marriage. He founded the home. The
home, the nation, the church, are all designed by God to work together to
help people get to heaven but it has to start with each and every one of us.
Maybe you've never become a part of the Lords family, friend, that's the
greatest thing you could do to help your nation and your home and the
church is to become a Christian.
Have you heard the word of God Romans 10:17? Do you believe
Jesus is the Christ John 8:24? Are you willing to repent and change your
ways Luke 13:3? Have you made that good confession that Jesus is the
Christ the Son of the living God Romans 10:9-10?
And above all, would you be immersed in water for the forgiveness of
your sins so that you can contact the blood of Jesus Christ? If you've never
done those things, we encourage you to.
With a renewed vigor, may each of us, in each of our homes, strive to
put God first in all that we say and do.
Study Questions for: “Godly Homes: Lesson 1”
1. Psalm 127:1 “Unless the __________ builds the house, they labor in
vain who build it.”
2. According to Genesis 2, who created marriage?
3. In Matthew 19:3-6 when Jesus was discussing divorce, He said “From
the ___________________ it was not so.”
4. According to Matthew 5:16, what should we let others see in us?
5. Who should we glorify according to Matthew 5:16?
6. Who did Joshua and his household choose to serve according to Joshua
7. According to 2 Timothy 2:15, what should we do to show ourselves
approved unto God?
8. In Deuteronomy 6:6-9, where were they to put His law and teaching?
9. According to 1 Thessalonians 5:17, how are we to pray?
10. What must we do according to Luke 13:3?